Monday, August 31, 2009
Why my Blog Name
"Not just a pretty smile" kind of a different Blog name I know, but oh sooooooo meaningful to me. I have been told my whole life by multiple people, "You have a very pretty smile." Nothing bad on the surface but what I have always heard is "It's a bummer that you are so fat, but at least you have a pretty smile." I realize that people are just trying to give me a genuine compliment and there I go scrutinizing it. However, I just long to hear something different. My solace comes from the fact that God looks at our heart and hence the title. I think there is more to me than "Just a pretty smile."
Up one pound . . . Really? . . . I didn't even get to cheat
Oh goodness . . . so today I woke up with the worst neck pain ever. I must have slept wrong. Then I chose to stand on the scale. I was up one pound. Aaaggggghhhh! I swear I have not cheated . . . For gosh sake, since I started this program, I have not even licked a finger, tasted a morsel, or picked up a crumb that I am not supposed to. Very frustrating, slightly discouraging . . . But not enough to take me down! I am off for a walk, oh yeah and another shake . . . More later!
Sunday, August 30, 2009
In the begining @ 306......and that's not the time!
Well here it is . . . a slightly unedited version of me. Today is August 30th 2009, and I want to share with you a bit about me and a bit about the journey I have decided to embark on. Maybe you want to join me . . . maybe you want to stay far, far, far away from me (I don't blame those of you that chose this option), and maybe you just want to watch me . . . nonetheless I am here.
Being Fat sucks! I HATE it! (I yelled that . . . could you hear me?) There you have it . . . That is REALLY, REALLY how I feel. I hate walking in crowds and seeing the stares. I hate going to church . . . I don't fit in the seats and the ones in the front mean I have to walk in front of everyone! I HATE how much my body hurts all the time. When I am at someone's house I have to be careful what seat I choose because I might break it . . . Theme parks are humiliating . . . I don't fit on any rides anymore . . . What is the point of even going. I see strangers look at me and then directly at my belly . . . as if IT was waving at them! I see kids whispering to their parents and pointing . . . Those incidents are the least painful, because for the most part, kids are just curious. Yes, of course, parts of my childhood play into my weight issues, as do my metabolism, my ethnicity and my . . . But the reality is, those are all excuses. It has been my choice to become the way I have become . . . and I am DONE!
My Name is Lee Dantzler and I am a food addict. Well, I am a . . . pasta, bread, cheese (Cheddar to be exact, but I'll take any kind) chips, candy, salt, cookies, crackers . . . In short carbohydrates and fats addict! When I weighed in on August 4th 2009 I weighed 305 pounds. On August 18th I weighed 306 pounds. On August 19th I started a medically supervised weightloss program called HMR. I am happy to report that today . . . this morning I weighed 293 pounds . . . It has been a really long eleven days . . . . . . But down 13 pounds! I'll take it!!! HMR stands for (Hungry Mother Rucker :) j/k. It really stands for Health Management Resourses. They give you the food that you are allowed to eat . . . Shakes, shakes and more shakes, two entrees a day and up to two bars a day. The food does not taste all that bad . . . It is just hard to give up variation and cravings.
I remember a couple of weeks ago Jeff and I went to the Silver Spur for breakfast. I whined and complained the entire hour we waited to be seated . . . Oh how I would gladly wait two hours now, I'd even sit perfectly still . . . Just to have anything on their menu. I gotta keep this up! My moods and emotions have gone crazy haywire . . . In another post at another time I will share more . . . but for now . . . Not Just a Pretty Smile is signing off. Gotta go make a shake!
Being Fat sucks! I HATE it! (I yelled that . . . could you hear me?) There you have it . . . That is REALLY, REALLY how I feel. I hate walking in crowds and seeing the stares. I hate going to church . . . I don't fit in the seats and the ones in the front mean I have to walk in front of everyone! I HATE how much my body hurts all the time. When I am at someone's house I have to be careful what seat I choose because I might break it . . . Theme parks are humiliating . . . I don't fit on any rides anymore . . . What is the point of even going. I see strangers look at me and then directly at my belly . . . as if IT was waving at them! I see kids whispering to their parents and pointing . . . Those incidents are the least painful, because for the most part, kids are just curious. Yes, of course, parts of my childhood play into my weight issues, as do my metabolism, my ethnicity and my . . . But the reality is, those are all excuses. It has been my choice to become the way I have become . . . and I am DONE!
My Name is Lee Dantzler and I am a food addict. Well, I am a . . . pasta, bread, cheese (Cheddar to be exact, but I'll take any kind) chips, candy, salt, cookies, crackers . . . In short carbohydrates and fats addict! When I weighed in on August 4th 2009 I weighed 305 pounds. On August 18th I weighed 306 pounds. On August 19th I started a medically supervised weightloss program called HMR. I am happy to report that today . . . this morning I weighed 293 pounds . . . It has been a really long eleven days . . . . . . But down 13 pounds! I'll take it!!! HMR stands for (Hungry Mother Rucker :) j/k. It really stands for Health Management Resourses. They give you the food that you are allowed to eat . . . Shakes, shakes and more shakes, two entrees a day and up to two bars a day. The food does not taste all that bad . . . It is just hard to give up variation and cravings.
I remember a couple of weeks ago Jeff and I went to the Silver Spur for breakfast. I whined and complained the entire hour we waited to be seated . . . Oh how I would gladly wait two hours now, I'd even sit perfectly still . . . Just to have anything on their menu. I gotta keep this up! My moods and emotions have gone crazy haywire . . . In another post at another time I will share more . . . but for now . . . Not Just a Pretty Smile is signing off. Gotta go make a shake!
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